Jurassic Party

Brandon with his red velvet OKC cake

Kissing my birthday boy in our OKC fan attire

We celebrated Brandon's 8th birthday "jurassic park" style with a party at the Reptile Zoo!  All the kids loved it.  This was an interactive party where everyone had an opportunity to hold snakes, lizards, toads, spiders, scorpions etc. As it was Brandon's special day, he was the assistant and held every amazing creature.  I was impressed at the way he was able to handle these animals. He has natural ability.  I am not as terrified of snakes as I am rodents, but there is still a little fear, but I put on my best Captain Courageous face on and faced my fear upfront. What an experience! The party was a success. 

Starting the party with pizza!

albino snake

Jabba---the very fat toad

My Little Kevin Durant

We are a basketball family.  I am into running now, but as a family, our sport is basketball.  My dad loves the game.  My brother, Leroy, was and still is an amazing basketball player.  He was a star, and  growing up, there was never a kid better than him.  He could play 1 on 5 and still win. He is that good. No exaggeration.  My dad coached my brother and I when we were young for many years.  Yvette, my sister,was also a quite a talented basketball player. She was the free throw hoop winner in Cochise County. When I was a child, during the weekends, my dad often took Leroy, Yvette, and I out to the courts, and we would play competitive two on two games.  Let's just say--I spent alot of time on the basketball courts when I was young.  If I was not playing, I was a cheerleader for my dad's teams.  Dylan is also obsessed with basketball.  It is his life, and he knows everything about the game.  Brandon, Lance, and I are OKC Thunder fans whereas Dylan loves the Celtics.  Additionally, Lance played high-school basketball and was an All American. He played one-year of college ball as well. Some families do baseball; others do tennis or swimming, but our sport is basketball.

So it is not surprising that Brandon is developing a love for the game. He completed a mini mites basketball program offered by the city.  I know Brandon was one of the eldest kids in the program, but he is also the most skilled.  The program ended today and it taught the participants the basic fundamentals of basketball.  Next summer, he joins the "real" league, and watch out! He is that good! He is a little Kevin Durant!
 



Brandon gets his defensive game on!





Hands Up--Playing aggressive defense



Brandon dribbling down the court....

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder (In A Very Painful Way)

I'm pathetic and abnormal, but I would not change it for the world.  Lance spent the last four days in San Diego. His friend, Keith, came to visit from Texas, and they had a well-deserved boys weekend.  Keith's son, Boyd, also joined them.  Dylan met Boyd two years ago, and Dylan absolutely adores him.  He could not stop talking about how wonderful Boyd is....I hope I can meet him soon.

Keith and Lance have been friends since they were teenage boys.  Lance considers Keith a brother, and he loves him dearly. I'm glad they got to spend the weekend together, but I can't help but wonder what these boys did over the weekend.  Maybe there was some strange male bonding that took place? I'm a little too afraid to ask. I prefer to remain in the dark; all I do know is that Jack Daniels was probably a participant in all the weekend activities.  Seriously though, Lance loves spending time with his Keith.  They are brothers.
 

These last few days have been difficult.  I tossed and turned every night. I do not sleep well without Lance.  We have been sending pathetic text messages to each other over the last four days.  I know we have been together just over two years, but the passion in our marriage only seems to get stronger.  I know most couples do well with a break. In fact, it is actually quite healthy to have a break, but for me, I say "f**k" these breaks.  I miss him too much.

Dont get me wrong.  I am not some clingy woman. I am far from being clingy.  I am an extremely independent, self sufficient, strong, opinionated, outspoken, and confident woman.  I have a very strong self identity, and I do not need my husband to feel worthy.  However, I am so ridiculously in love with him.  He is my BEST friend, and an absence that extends for more than a day or two transforms a healthy break to an aching heartache.  I literally count the days and the hours until I can see him again.  I think you can be both.  You can be independent and your own person, but you can also love someone so much that it consumes you.

These last few days for me though were busy.  I took the kids to their extracurricular activities (Brandon and Dylan's basketball, Mia's gymnastics); I cleaned the house; I took Buddy and Bella out twice daily for their walks; I went shopping; I worked on my boss' farewell gift; and I spent everyday at the gym.  I looooooove to work out.  I can easily spend three hours in the gym.

I want my husband to be happy.  He truly does deserve these boys' weekends, and I will never stop him from doing them, but as a woman completely in love with her husband, I'll be lamenting and wallowing in overly dramatic misery until he returns.  Again, I wouldn't change it for the world.  I hope what I feel now never goes away.  I want these absences to always feel painful.  I want to always be that much in love with him.  And one last note, I'm not alone.  Contrary to Lance's rough, tough, testosterone-filled, manly man exterior, he is just as pathetic as me.

We are both the same in one.

Keith and Boyd

Lance on the dingy with the Midway behind him.  He looks so cute.

Two brothers....by the way, they have twin jackets on...



Um...ok...not sure how to take this...um...should I be concerned?



There is Another Reason to Celebrate Valentine's Day!

Valentines Day is extra special for me.   It is the day God blessed me with Brandonio(nicknamed given to Brandon by Dylan).  Brandon Joaquin Bivens was born at noon on February 14, 2005.  I woke up at 5:30 a.m. that morning having cramps.  Five-year old Dylan was home from school as it was a school holiday.  I endured the first four hours of constant cramping at home.  However, as the cramps became more and more frequent, I knew the baby was coming.  This was not a false alarm.  I had called my mom who was at work, and she phoned my aunt who was not at work to drive me to the hospital.   I arrived at the hospital around 10:30 a.m. and I was quickly admitted because I was already 8 mm dilated. For those who don’t know, you start pushing at 10 mm.  My mom and Jacob (Brandon’s dad) arrived shortly after followed by Nana who came to take care of Dylan.  I did not have an epidural as I was already too far along.  I did not even have a full dosage of morphine.  I was only given a half dose.  Yes, I’m boasting about the fact that I went through labor with minimal drugs.  I started pushing at 11:45 a.m. and he was out in the world 15 mins later.  Brandon's birth was the easiest labor for me out of my three kids.  However, unbeknownst to me at the time, Brandon’s labor almost became critical.  I did not realize it until I saw the video. Yeah, I filmed his birth.  I also filmed Mia’s birth.  I think it is a wonderful, once in a lifetime experience and I want them to be able to see themselves coming into the world.  When I watched the video later…for about 30 seconds or so, the doctor could not get Brandon’s shoulders out.  His head was out, but his shoulders were stuck.  I did not know it at the time, but looking at the video, the doctor screams to her assistant, “Call for help!” There is an immediate look of fear and concern in her facial expression.  I later learned that this is called “shoulder dysplasia”, which is very serious. Babies who have their shoulders stuck in the birth canal can often become paralyzed on that side of their body.  They do not get use of their arms.  Fortunately, we were blessed, and Dr. York was able to get Brandonio out.  He was my second biggest baby.  He was 8 lbs 14 oz. He had short blond fuzz hair which later grew into beautiful blond curls when he was a toddler.  Those curls disappeared after Brandon’s dad shaved his head. Needless to say, I was NOT happy.  He looked like a white baby whereas everyone has always said I look hispanic.  I took Brandon to Costco when he was an infant, and the cashier thought I was his nanny.

approximately 6 1/2 months pregnant with Brandonio

  

8 months pregnant

Showing off my big belly with Brandonio

Happy Birthday My Valentines Day Boy!



As a baby, Brandonio showed early signs of his personality.  He was cranky, stubborn, independent, and borderline colicky, but he was also very smart.  He picked up on things quickly. I know I am smart, but Brandon surpasses me by far.  Dylan (my oldest) and Mia (my youngest) favored their dad.  I was usually the disciplinarian and would always be the one to say, “no”.  Since he was an infant, Brandon, however, was always a mommy’s boy.  It seems contradictory since he is the most independent and stubborn of the three, but he has always connected to me more than anyone.  I think Brandon’s personality is most similar to mine. I never help him with homework and yet, he continually gets As.  He is small and thin, but he is athletic and does not allow his size to interfere with his goals.  I have no doubt that this little boy of mine is going to grow into an amazing man who is going to make the world a much better place.

 

1 week old



Brandon shows first sign of rebellion....

 

9 months old

  

9 months old

He is eight years old now, and oftentimes, we forget how young he really is because Brandon acts like he is 11 years old.  Occasionally, I get to see him as an 8 year old because he still wants kisses from me.  He still wants me to tuck him in bed every night, which is just the way I want it to be because I love kissing my Valentine's Day baby.

2 years old



4 years old



5 years old

  

My life is so much better because of Brandonio, and I could have not been more blessed.  I love my Brandonio more than life itself.

Happy 8th Birthday Brandon!!  Mommy loves you more than anything!

Run Dylan Run!

Dylan ran his second half marathon, Surf City, on Sunday, February 3.  I am so proud of him. He does not train, but being young and athletic, he doesn’t really need to.  He ran his first half marathon, Disneyland,  last September.  and completed the 13.1  mile course in over 2:45:45.  He looked quite miserable at the end.  He ended up sleeping for 18 hours straight.  Six months later, a noticeable difference was observed.  He looked as if he had only just ran a 10k.  Additionally, he completed it in 2:24:39….that is an inspiring 20-min improvement!  

 

Fun at the Expo



At the expo--holding up his bib





Getting his gear ready the night before



Pre-Race  (We are ready to go!)

What is even more wonderful  is that Dylan is now getting that thirst for running.  He asked me to sign him up for the May OC half marathon, and he wants to complete the series so he could earn his Beach Cities Medal. To qualify for this medal, you have to run three half marathons in one year (Surf City, OC, and Long Beach).  Lance has lost interest in running half marathons so I’m especially excited that Dylan is now expressing interest so I have someone to do these with.

Look at our bling!!

This is the medal Dylan will receive if he completes the three designated half marathons in one year.



How Well Do We (Lance and Liz) Know Each Other?

I think married couples need to be best friends; being lovers is not enough.  You have to be married to your best friend because otherwise, the chances of a happy, successful marriage of longevity becomes not so promising.  Lance and I did one of those ridiculous surveys on the internet.  This questionnaire focused on how well we knew each other.  We did very, very well.  Highlighted answers were incorrect, and as you can see, there were not many we got wrong.  We are best friends and we share EVERYTHING.   

1.  Name your partner's three best friends

    Liz's response:        Keith Kosan, Elizabeth Fellows Wade, Mike Tedford
    Lance's response:   Cheryl, Sherry, Roberta

2.  Name some of your partner's accomplishments

  Liz' response:   Navy career, bringing the 90ft boat down to San Diego, restoring the boat
  Lance's response:  College graduation, kids, writing

3. What does your partner consider his greatest loss/regret in life?

   Liz's response:  marrying his first wife, Trudy
   Lance's response:  losing her first family

4. What will be playing on the radio if your partner was driving?

    Liz's response:   Talk radio on some conservative station then country music
    Lance's response:  Hip hop

5. What is your partner’s favorite ice cream?

     Liz's response:  Mint chocoloate chip
     Lance's response:  Strawberry

6. Name 10 extended family members of your partner

    Liz's response: This is hard. I dont know any of your uncles and aunts or cousins
    Lance's response: Fuck that.
 
7. What physical features is your partner most unhappy about?

     Liz's response:  His big belly
     Lance's response:  Her stomach

8. What is the full name of your partners parents?

     Liz's response:  Joseph Donald Wade, Patricia Ella Rowe
     Lance's response: Roy fellows don't know middle and Mylinh tran 

9. Names some of your partners fears?

     Liz's response:  Answered correctly but will not be stated in a public blog.
     Lance's response:  Mice and going over a bridge

 
10. Who is their first love?

      Liz's response:  Mignon
      Lance's response:  Shitball she lost her virginity to

 
11. What did they want to be when they grew up?

    Liz's response:  A pilot

    Lance's response:  Actress

12. What is their favorite desert?

    Liz's response:  Ice cream (partly wrong--should have added cheesecake)

    Lance's response:  Creme brû lée

13. What is their favorite color?

     Liz's response:  Royal blue

     Lance's response:  pink

14. Strawberry? Chocolate or Vanilla?

    Liz's response:  Strawberry

   Lance's response:  Strawberry

15. Where were they born? Date?

     Liz's response:  Houston, Texas August 15, 1958
     Lance's response:  Vietnam, November 17, 1972

16. What is their favorite holiday?

         Liz's response: Christmas   
        Lance's response: Christmas

17. How do you describe him/her to other people

Liz's response:  Funny, accomplished, smart, sensitive, opinionated, loyal, traditional values,    conservative, family oriented       

   Lance's response:  bright, smart, funny, crude, energetic, beautiful          
            

18. What is the one thing I do that makes you crazy/irritated?—

     Liz's response: When i need love and softness, he gets cold.
     Lance:  leaves used dental floss everywhere and clutter

19. What is the things that I do that you absolutely love?

    Liz's response:  When he write me love letters

    Lance's response:  she loves me uncondtionally

20. Does your partner believe in marriage counseling?

     Liz's response:  yes
     Lance's response:  yes

21. Partner’s favorite show?

   Liz's response:   Dexter, True Blood, Homeland, Breaking Bad

   Lance's response:  Dexter true blood breaking bad homeland.

22. Is the partner a good singer?

   Liz's response:  Yes, very good.

   Lance's response:  No

23. What is the craziest thing he ever did in his life?

   Liz response:   Have sex on an airplane (So this is WHY he need to do it with me)

   Lance response:  Marry me after 2 months

in rethinking this, his craziest thing would have been marrying someone after 2 months.

24. How many lovers has your spouse had?

     Liz's response:  12

     Lance's response:  9

25. Name extracurricular activities your spouse did as a child?

     Liz's response:  Basketball, building things, built a gokart from a lawnmower engine
     Lance's response:  Writing, basketball, cheerleading 

26. Your spouse’s best friend as a child?

      Liz's response:  Glen Roller

      Lance's response:  Sister

27. Where would your spouse want to go for dinner? What would they order?

       Liz's response:  Steak and potatoes

       Lance's response: Vietnamese

29.  Your spouse’s favorite physical feature?

       Liz's response:  His height….and broad shoulders

       Lance's response: Her eyes

29. If your relationship did not work out, do you think you could be just friends?

      Liz's response:  Yes I could be but no he could not

      Lance's response:  no