Birthday Celebration for a Beautiful 9 Year-Old Princess

I cannot even begin to express the joy my little girl gives me.  In the Asian culture, it is not uncommon for boys to be favored in the household.  When I was growing up, it was known to all that my mom favored my brother.  My sister and I were treated differently.  It was obvious, and though it is not the ideal situation, it was what it was…..When I found out I was pregnant with a girl, I had concerns on whether I would continue this cycle of treating my daughter less favorably than my sons.  I had two boys, and I couldn’t imagine loving anyone more.  I did not want to be like my mother where my daughter felt less.  I wanted to break that cycle, but yes, I was very worried that I would treat my baby girl differently than the boys.

After she was born, I realized that I do treat her differently.  It is not what you may think though.  I treat her differently because frankly, my relationship with her is different than my relationship with my sons.  What I don't do though is favor my boys over her.  All my children are loved/treated equally.  I have a different relationship with each one because they have different personalities, but all are given an equal amount of love and attention.

Mia has been a blessing to me. The fact is there will never be another girl in this world that I will love more than Mia. NEVER.  She cuddles with me, and I love the quality time we have together.  I love love love love love having a daughter.  I am a tomboy, and I was also concerned that I wouldn’t connect well with a girly girl.  Mia is a girly girl, but she is also a tomboy. She is one of those girls who are both. 

I convinced her to not have a birthday party this year, because frankly, they are exhausting to me.  Instead, we opted to have a girls night together!  I took her to get her first manicure and pedicure. She had seen friends get it done, and I wanted her to be pampered.  I am completely out of place in a nail salon.  My nails are chewed up.  My toenails are black and missing (from running).  I sat there as she was spoiled. She giggled and smiled, and I knew she loved every moment of it.

Since I have never been in a nail salon, we didn't bring flip flops for Mia after her pedicure.  We had to walk out in those flimsy pink flip flops they gave us and go straight to Old Navy to get her a pair. 

so cute!

flower design on her toe

my bitten nails next to Mia's manicure.  

Afterwards, we went shopping.  We went to Barnes and Noble and Justice.  Mia is a tween. She likes clothes, jewelry and fashion.  She always has.  We had dinner together that night, just the two of us, before we continued on our shopping excursion which ultimately led us to Target and Payless.  I LOVED spoiling her!

dinner at Pei Wei

When we were in Payless, Mia wanted some sneakers.  I couldn’t believe she wanted another pair, and I told her she had many, and I said, “you want to get a pair of sneakers from Payless…a pair of Champions when you already have Nikes and Asics?”  Anyway, it was her day so I got what she wanted.

The world is so harsh and cruel, and I worry about my sensitive, sweet little girl.  I am fiercely protective of her, and I want her to grow up, believing she is the most AMAZING, STRONG, INTELLIGENT, CAPABLE, BEAUTIFUL girl in the world.  I look at her and I am in awe. 

Mia, thank you for being my girl.  I will always be your #1 fan, and there isn’t anything, ANYTHING I wouldn’t do for you.  I am so proud of you, and you are the most incredible girl!!!  I love you SO MUCH!

Some birthday presents for Mia....

Grphyons- Division B, Winter Season Champions

Basketball has become a dominant part of our family life. Lance and Dylan have coached five basketball teams, and they just finished the 2016 Winter Season as Division B undefeated champions.  Participating in this as a family has really united us and has also given us a deeper connection to the community.  We have met so many people, and we’ve become a recognizable face/name at the recreation center.  We have seen kids grow and develop into better ball players.  They still approach Lance with bright smiles and greet him as “Coach Lance”.  Dylan has matured through this process as well, and he has become a much more confident leader. 

Gryphons Selfie

The season ended, and we were undefeated.  This is the second back-to-back championship for Lance and Dylan.  I know many players are specifically requesting to be on their team, because they have come up and admitted so, but unfortunately, not all of those requests are honored as they (Recreation Center) try diligently to keep the team’s fair and balance.  One of the girls on our previous team gave Dylan a difficult time because she was not on our team this year even though she requested to have us as a coach.  She told Dylan, “I’m mad at you.  I was supposed to be on your team.  I requested you guys, but you replaced me with another girl.” 

In the Winter, the top two champion teams (first and second place) from Fountain Valley compete in a regional tournament against other local champion teams.  The tournament was held on Friday in Garden Grove, and for the first time, the Gryphons had to contend with defeat.  Lance and I are not sure how the other cities operate their programs, but none of the teams had any weak players.  Every single player could adequately or extraordinarily handle the ball and shoot.  We learned that the cities are able to recruit and build their teams.  In Fountain Valley, we are only allowed two request.  Imagine if we were able to recruit our team?  It seems a complete waste of time to continue onto the tournament if you are not given a competitive chance to win.  Lance encouraged to the kids to ‘have fun’ and take ‘wild shots’.  We came to the tournament with every intention to win, but after three quarters into the game, we knew it wasn’t going to happen.   We lost both games. 

Scrimmage against the other FV team before the tournament

Tournament photos

Lance and Dylan get a three-month break before summer season begins. We are trying to convince the Recreation Center to create an all-star team and have the first place team’s coach be the All-Start coach. This may be a possibility this summer. We shall see.

Happy Five Year Anniversary!

Today isn’t just our wedding anniversary.  Today is much more.  Today is testimony of the strength and love in our marriage.  It is also a reaffirmation that great things involve great risks.  I dated you for a brief 10 weeks before we headed to the Santa Ana Courthouse to legally and spiritually unite, and though 10 weeks may seem shocking to most, in reality, we actually set a court date within one month of dating.  One month!! The gamble was high, and the chances of failure likely.  All rationale and logic thrown out of the window for you…for us. The complete insanity of the act is reflected in the comment made by one, “I hope it lasts.” Quite honestly, I know most had bets on if we would make it beyond a one-year anniversary.  Well, we did, and not only did we, but the love I feel for you is radically stronger, deeper, and more consummate. (I will admit that there is a part of me that gloats and relishes in proving everyone wrong.)

The last five years have been a whirlwind of insurmountable happiness.  I cannot imagine how I lived for 39 years without you, because now, you are so necessary to my existence. I need you.  In fact, my greatest fear is to lose you.  I am not ashamed to admit it and expose my vulnerability.  You are not only my husband, but my best friend, my partner, my confident, and simply “My Everything”.   You are the one I need.  You are the one who understands me.  You are the one who makes me feel safe.  You are the one whose presence I never get tired of.   You are the one who I share everything with.  You are the one who I can just simply look at and be moved to tears.  Have you ever loved someone so much that tears fall from your eyes when you just look at them?   I am a romantic. As an English major, literature left me with an unrealistic perception of “love”. I’ve been cursed with what I oftentimes thought was an insatiable need for a passionate, all-consuming love.  I always wanted something more, and with you, the dreams from my younger self are fulfilled.  I feel so utterly complete.

married!

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always felt a little out of place in this world.  I knew I was a little inappropriate, too sensitive and passionate, somewhat crude and frankly just an odd duck, but with you—I have someone who understands and accepts me for who I am.  When I want to travel across the world to save elephants, you eagerly jump on board.  When I make all these charitable donations to and for these causes, you support it.  When I run race after race after race after race, you willingly oblige. When I plan our honeymoon around Auschwitz, you are all for it.  When I adopted two mental dogs, you loved them as well.  When I behave completely inappropriate, you tolerate me with a slight roll of the eyes.  When I want to jump out of a plane, you don't try to dissuade me.  When I want to take romantic carriage rides through a cemetery instead of a town square, you happily agree. When I am gross and disgusting (because I know I am), you make me still feel beautiful.  You accepted and loved my three children as if they are your own.  You were there for me when I had to say my final goodbye to my father.  Lance, we are the best, BEST team. I sometimes imagine all that we would have accomplished/done if we met when we were younger, but I cannot have remorseful wishes like that because I know I’m truly blessed to have just found you.  Period.  It may have taken 39 years, but I finally found you.

“Marry someone who will make you fall in love with God every single day”……that one quote is the most perfect quote for our marriage.  I know it was not your intention, but you do, Lance.  You really do bring me closer to God. For me, this quote sums up our marriage and of you as my husband.  I know you are not perfect, but you are ‘perfect for me’.   You give me so much.  You help raise my kids.  You support me.  You believe in me. You encourage me.  You laugh with me.  You inspire me.  You love me, and your love is a precious, precious gift that I will always treasure; however, your GREATEST gift to me is your unconscious ability to bring me closer to God.  You make me fall more in love with God with every single day.  I thank you for that. 

I love you so much Lance.  I truly, sincerely want you to feel loved and happy.  Every action I do is made with consideration of you.  I hope you know that you can depend on me….that I will always be here for you and that I will never turn my back on you.  Thank you for being my husband and for choosing me as your wife.  I am the happiest I have ever ever been in my life, and that is because of you.  I love you more, so much more today than yesterday. 

Happy Five Year Anniversary.

now go win that game tonight, because I am not going to be married to a LOSER!!

Sweet June (and of lesser value: Health Update)

Shoulder Surgery on a Stubborn Patient 

Lance is not the type of man to complain about pain, but lately, I have seen an increase in the amount of pain killers he is taking, and I grew concerned.  It sucks getting old.  It really does.  Your body begins to deteriorate, and you have to contend with all the aches and pains of an aged body.  When I first met Lance, I knew he suffered from an old shoulder injury as well as compressed discs in his neck.  He managed but the pain got progressively worse.  I wanted him to look into possibly trying to repair the shoulder.  He was very reluctant due to a very unsuccessful ear surgery a year or two before,  but I kept insisting.  It was getting worse, and I was worried.

We finally scheduled the surgery with one of the top specialist whose primary patients were professional sports athletes in the Southern California region.  Lance had injured his shoulder back in the late 90s from a skiing accident.  His shoulder separation was considered a grade III.  The doctor emphasized that he would not be able to completely repair the shoulder injury, but that he could improve it by 80 percent.  

It’s been three week since we drove to Los Angeles for the surgery.  He is now recovering and doing everything he shouldn’t be doing.  I know it is difficult for him to “take it easy”, but he is frankly pissing me off.  As soon as we arrived home from surgery, he removed the sling.  He is supposed to still be wearing it, and fortunately, I was able to convince him to put it on.  He removed all of his bandages two days early.  He refuses to ice it.  He took a shower sooner than allowed.  He also decided to take a bike ride six days post operation.  I want this operation to be a success and the major impediment is Lance.  In a few weeks, he is supposed to be in physical therapy.  He told me yesterday that he didn’t feel there was a need.  I adamantly disagreed with him.  I think I finally convinced him that he WILL go to therapy.

Triennial Colonoscopy

I also had my triennial colonoscopy.  Yes, lucky me. I’m on a three-year plan.  I have never been drunk in my life so it is amusing to me to hear Lance tell me things that I don’t remember doing or saying.  I was drugged up from the procedure that I had no clue how I got dressed or out of the hospital.  Lance said that I got out of bed, completely naked telling everyone I was ready to go. The curtain was wide open and I was standing there exposed.  Lance also said I was talking to the doctor. I have no recollection of that either.  I wanted to convince the doctor to space out the procedure and not put me on the three-year plan.  

I did have my follow-up appointment, and I’m so happy that I’m now on the five-year plan.  Even though the colonoscopy showed areas of inflammation in my colon, I feel I am in the great shape.  When I was getting prepped for the procedure, the nurse asked me if I was a runner.  I was very surprised by this question. How did she know?  When I replied affirmatively, I asked her how she could possibly know that? She said that my resting heart rate was very low, which is common in endurance athletes.  I had a very strong heart. 

yes, I take a photo prior to a colonoscopy. Who does that???? ME!!!

June Bug

Lance and I were able to welcome our very first new granddaughter, June Thompson.  We made the long 9-hour drive to Eastern Arizona to see her three weeks after she was born.  She is absolutely precious.  I forget how small newborn babies are… she was bundled up like a little worm.  I loved the way she smelled and her cute little angelic face.  

We were also able to see our two daughters, Lauren and Jessie.  Lauren is the new mommy.  Jessie flew in from Idaho for the weekend so it was a mini reunion.  We were able to give the girls their new matching Pandora charm bracelets.  We have decided that it is going to be our tradition so that on every birthday, they would receive a new charm for their bracelet. I want them to be able to look at their wrists and be reminded of how special they are and how much they are loved.  

Look at that precious face! (no, not mine.  June's!!!)

Little girl fast asleep. 

We didn’t do much during the weekend, which was absolutely what Lance and I needed. We spent all of the time just catching up, and of course, loving on June and our two grandsons, Carter and Jax.  I told Lance that I wanted the grandkids to ALWAYS associate us with presents and candy.  Everytime they see us, I want them to expect a special little gift.  What are grandparents for other than spoiling grandchildren?  We brought them early and late birthday presents.  It was wonderful watching them open them up.  It was a small Christmas in March.  They are such good, sweet boys.  Carter doesn’t see us as often as we would like, but he continues to be so loving.  He hugs us as if he saw us daily.  There is no, “who the heck are these people?”  Carter is also a bit of a booger. Literally.  The cute little booger kept digging in his nose and shoving his finger in his mouth. When we would gasp in disgust, he just giggled and continued doing it.  It was one of those things that the bigger our disgusted response, the more Carter shoved his finger happily in his mouth.  He did it to get more of a response from us.  Haha.  Too funny and too gross!  

Carter and I having fun taking 'selfies'

two-year old little Jaxon

Saturday afternoon, we went to see Lance’s ex in-laws (his ex brother and sister in law).  Lance always had a special connection to his ex brother-in law and wanted very much to see him. We learned he was in town for the birth of his own grandchild.  When they reunited, it was as if no time was lost.  It had been a little over 20 years, but it seemed like yesterday for these two friends.  I know it provided Lance with a sense of relief, because he does feel remorse for the events of the past and knowing that everyone has moved beyond and that all was forgiven was very comforting for him.  I guess time does heal all wounds. 

Saturday evening was spent with nice BBQ and a fire pit in the backyard. We spent more time just talking.  

I didn’t take as many photos as I would have liked, and the trip was very short.  We arrived Saturday night only to leave Monday morning.  The good news though is that we will be seeing everyone again in September. 

the only group photo taken before we departed

My Top Gun

they look pretty cool in these fighter suits

It is not every day that a boy turns 11.  My Brandon is growing up.  It just seems like yesterday that I held this little tiny baby boy in my arms.  I sometimes look back at old photos of him, and I miss the days where I could kiss him freely.  Now, my kisses are received with unpredictability. Depending upon his mood, he may or may not welcome my smooches. 

I spent his actual birthday (Valentine Day) running the LA Marathon, but when I woke up that morning and was going through my pre-race ritual, I sat down with my coffee and sent a message to him.  A lot was going on that day for me, but nothing as important as Brandon’s birthday.  He was with his dad, but I wanted him to know that he was my first thought.

We didn’t celebrate his birthday until two weeks later, and the celebrations were done in style.  Brandon had a ‘fighter jet’ birthday party at FlightDeck, which provides real life air combat experience through simulation machines.  The guests went through a briefing prior to getting in the cockpits.  I personally found the briefing to be VERY confusing.  Lance who flew many times and had a pilot’s license (it’s expired) said the instructor could have simplified the instructions. 

The boys were very eager to get into the simulators, and quite honestly, they spent the first few minutes trying to control their jets.  There were a lot of crashes into the ocean.  The consoles were very sensitive.   Lance was also eager to try, and he got into the simulators as well. He said it was very realistic.  Each guest also had two attempts to try to land their plane onto an aircraft carrier.  Out of 24 attempts, there were only two successful landings.  It was DIFFICULT.

about to get into the simulator

Following the adrenaline pumped experience, we settled down for pizza and cake.  While eating, the instructors announced each person’s flight scoring, which included how many kills and successful landings.  Brandon (aka Thunderbird.  He chose this name.) received the Top Gun score with the most kills, and in recognition of that accomplishment, he received his own set of aviator glasses.  Frankly, he looks bad-ass with those sunglasses on.  I love aviator glasses.

Lance and Dylan want to return to FlightDeck to try the simulated commercial airplanes.  They actually have retired pilots training you on this, and we also learned many of the employees at FlightDeck are retired servicemen.  Lance immediately bonded with them.

(I must add that there are two sets of simulators--one for adults and one for the kids.)

This is the small, less advanced simulator for kids. 

This is the adult simulators.  Very high tech. 

Happy Birthday Brandon!  I love you so much, and I grow more proud of you every day.